Does this sounds familiar? It did for me and so many of my clients.
One may think, taking a breath before responding will change the outcome of a troubling situation and while that breath can help A LOT. But there is only so much you change about how you react and relate to situations prior to getting your hands on really effective tools. Many of the popular tools don’t provide the permanent shifts within your psyche what actually change the foundation of where the reaction comes from in the first place.
This is where the real magic happens - transforming the internal issue that cause the reaction in the first place - Not changing the way we handle the external situation. We want to cure the issue, not try to put a band aid over it or medicate it.
So the next time you are feeling triggered, I invite you to dig deeper. Let yourself feel into that feeling. What does it feel like to be triggered by whatever it is that is upsetting you? Really let yourself feel what it feels like. You can experiences this in the body as sensation or maybe just a sort of knowing or awareness.
If you don’t feel much at first, you are not alone. It was a challenge for me when I was first introduced to this years ago, but I’m encouraging you - don’t give up if it doesn’t work right away, it is worth keeping at it.
And this is a feeling exercise, so try not to get too invested in the thoughts. Feeling can be challenging, especially for those of us who have traumatic backgrounds, the tendency is to shut off feelings, but life is so much more magical when we can learn how to feel again and to use those feelings to our advantage.
When you do tap into the way you feel when something upsets you, invite yourself to recall an earlier occurrence of that kind of feeling. You might do this by imagining yourself floating above a timeline of your life and you may float down to this earlier occurrence.
Observe the occurrence. Notice what is happening during this event or time in which you experienced similar feelings. Then, invite yourself back to an even earlier occurrence. Continue this process until you feel you have arrived at the earliest occurrence and then sit with this experience for a bit, feel what it feels like, notice what is happening during this event and ask yourself, what did this event lead me to believe about myself or about other people? What need was not met during this experience?
Likely, that wound is being re-exposed which is what causes triggering in current situations and in order to heal it permanently, other tools may be needed. Starting here allows you to gain clarity around these feelings and a deep understanding of why you react or get so upset. Then, we can move into the really deep transformational work. This might be something like Inner Child Rescue, Belief Reprogramming, or Voice Dialog.
Send me an email so I can share those next steps with you: info@hs-hp.com